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Involve others – effective communication is a ‘two-way process’

 

Build rapport – build rapport before you begin to communicate

 

Scan the other person’s reaction to your communication - while you communicate constantly calibrate the other person’s reactions to your communication & keep adjusting your communication to keep it alive – eye accessing cues; words, tone, body language...

 

Mirror & Match - use appropriate ‘words, tone & body language’ (only exception don’t mirror or match the other person’s angry or volatile state of mind)

 

Find out the communication strategy of the other person – caution, same person can have different strategies for different things in life e.g., we play different role at different times – in office, at home, with friends...

 

Learn to tell stories that give a message – your audience will recall & apply their interpretation of the message to their requirements in life

 

Watch for deletions, distortions & generalization and ask the right questions to make the other person aware of their filters (deletions, distortions & generalization)

 

Watch yours & other’s emotional states – communication is ineffective when the participants to a communication are in an emotional state (angry, afraid, or too excited...etc.)

 

Do not contradict other’s beliefs, values & position directly - rather ask questions so that they realize their inappropriate beliefs or values by themselves.

 

BE & STAY OBJECTIVE:

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• WHY & WHAT ARE YOU COMMUNICATING?

• WHAT DO YOU WANT TO ACHIEVE?

• HOW CAN YOU BEST COMMUNICATE THAT TO THAT PERSON?

• HOW CAN YOU CONVINCE THEM TO PERCEIVE, THINK OR DO WHAT YOU WANT THEM TO DO?

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CAUTION:

 

• DON’T TRY TO WIN THE ARGUMENT, OR TRY TO IMPRESS, OR CONDEMN THE OTHER PERSON

• RESPECT THE OTHER PERSON’S POSITION OR VIEWPOINT.

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